The loneliness of remote work
I watched a trailer this week for Join or Die, which is a documentary about the work of researcher Robert Putnam, who wrote the book “Bowling Alone” and was urging officials and the public to pay attention to loneliness decades before the COVID pandemic. Though the film’s title may be overwrought, I am ready to host a screening because the topic ignites all the excitable neurons in my public health brain. This is a topic we talked about a lot during my MPH program, which was also prior to the pandemic.
Beyond the health angle, I am personally interested because I have worked from home for the past four years. One of my main incentives for returning to school was to be able to land a job where I could work in an office with co-workers again. My first job out of school, I worked from home because it was 2020 and everyone worked from home. My second, and current, job is also entirely remote. This was great while my kids were transitioning back to full-time school, and it also works well in the summer when their schedules vary from week to week. Here’s the thing about the remainder of the year: I talk to almost no one during the workday.
For example, the next meeting on my work calendar is two weeks from now. My husband, who also works from home but has a bountiful meeting schedule, suggested I start daily vocal exercises so I don’t lose muscle tone. I mean, I work in communications. How can one explain this paradox? I do hear from co-workers through email and instant messages, but actual voice conversations are very limited. This may sound like a dream to some; I hear that most people have too many meetings, and I know my own office is always trying to reduce meetings. This knowledge only increases my anguish.
No stranger to self-help reading am I, and so I have tried to change my perception of things. I have focused on gratitude as there are many reasons I feel fortunate for my job. I have attended the optional work-in-the-office day, but none of my co-workers were there and I felt as though I were in a spooky TV drama (looking at you, Severance). I’ve taken up new hobbies and made a greater effort to see people outside of work. I’ve started working one morning a week in a cafe, although I must incessantly toggle and squint with my wee laptop. I’ve listened to music, taken a greater interest in my already neurotic dog, and watched my little afternoon chocolate reward creep earlier and earlier in my day. I have pondered switching careers (again!) to something relentlessly social, say, kindergarten teacher.
Today, I found myself searching PubMed for studies on remote work and loneliness. As expected, I found dozens of articles about remote work early in the pandemic, something that I consider qualitatively different given that so many people were at home, but the most recent studies focus only on productivity. Is everybody exhausted of the topic? Not Robert Putnam, I guess.
I’ve accepted that I am not monastic enough to do this work indefinitely. I’m trying to be thoughtful about my step (with much love to teachers, it will not be kindergarten teacher). In the meantime, who wants to hang out this weekend?